Friday, June 15, 2012

thoughts on being a closet introvert, quoting keller, and bladder control (school of ministry: week 1)

foreword: i am going to TRY, to the best of my ability, to post weekly updates about my adventures and things i am learning while attending the school of ministry. because it is an intensive program, it seems that posting my daily thoughts/experiences is something that i cannot do for now. i will try to post daily soul food as much i can just so i don't leave the bloggity empty. 

SoM - week 1: so, we just finished our first week for school of ministry. here are some of the things i learned about the school or about myself this week:
  • this week we had pastor eddie and susan asato of grace bible maui as our teachers. they taught us about the overview of the old and new testament and the correlations of the old testament and new testament and what's going on in present day israel and the jewish culture. pretty interesting stuff. i've always had a hunger to learn more about the jewish culture and i felt like my brain walked into a theme park and i was fed jolly ranchers coz it was like candy to my soul... lots of information to digest. but one important thing i got out of it is the hunger to want to read God's word in a deeper level the way the asato's do. one favorite quote from pastor eddie: "God never gives judgement (or trials) without giving us hope beyond expectation". don't give up on hope!
  • i love meeting new people. =D i love hearing their stories and their journey with God.
  • i realized how long it really has been since i went to school. it's been a LONG TIME! i cant sit in my chair for too long coz i get really antsy. and i notice i use the restroom a lot coz i'm always the first one out during breaks. i have no bladder control. and i cannot for the life of me study in a noisy room anymore.
  • when we had to discuss what we think our "calling" was... i had no answer. after a decade of serving in church and leading smallgroups and moving 2500 miles away to be a missionary... i was dumbfounded in trying to answer the question. my answer was... "i dont know what my calling is right now...all i know is that i love God and i love people and im trying to figure out what that looks like for me right now". i wish i had a more theological answer. i wish i was as sure as my classmates are. but with what has transpired this past year, i am left with a heart that is holding everything open and i'm waiting on God to show me exactly what my calling is.
  • since i started the school...i haven't uttered the words "i want to go back home to LA" to my husband. that's a FIRST! though it's a lot of hard work, i'm really enjoying this time.
  • i have been able to minister to people in prayer and the prophetic once again. three out of the four days i've been, God allowed me to pray and encourage other people. i feel so ALIVE again...coz i love me some prayer and moving in the gifts of the spirit. there's something about an atmosphere full of spirit-filled christians that allow the gifts to flow. i really missed ministering in that way. i'm glad God is using me once again to encourage His children that way. atleast im sure of one thing - part of my calling is praying and encouraging His people.
  • i realized how slow i read now. and how ugly my writing is. and how weird it is that i have described myself as an extrovert all these years, but realized how much of an introvert i really am becoming coz when im in class, i like sitting by myself most of the time.
  • i hate reading the book: how to read the bible for all it's worth. seriously. and the fact that we have to finish the book in a week and write a survey about it annoys me so. BORING!
  • all these ministers and pastors love to quote tim keller. tim keller loves to quote c.s. lewis. because i want to sound more like the genius tim keller is, i will try to quote c. s. lewis more. why quote keller if you can quote lewis? ;)
well, that's about it. if you wanna learn about the information i learned in class, you're gonna have to enroll in the school yourself ;) gonna end this with an appropriate quote from c.s. lewis. lol 

nothing that you have not given away will ever really be yours. - c.s. lewis

give hope. give you. give love. give prayer. give encouragement. give Jesus.