Thursday, December 8, 2011

all things are possible indeed. #oneword2011

i moved here to hawaii to change the world. leaving family and friends behind, i packed my bags and took my son and my dog and decided to serve God here as a missionary to help a local church and bring a lil crazy flava' to the islands. as soon as i got here though, God decided it would be fun to turn my world completely upside down and He surprised me with a wonderful gift to heal my heart. 

my biggest fear in life was my fear of marriage. any one of my friends and those of you who've been reading my blog know how much that fear has gripped my heart. i would fly anywhere, write anything, talk to anyone for the gospel... but the one thing i never desired was to ever be in a place where my heart would be vulnerable in the hands of someone else.

i had to move 2500 miles away from home to realize how much my heart needed to learn to trust - in God and eventually in a man. i had to move 2500 miles away to realize how much my son needed a godly male role model in his life on a daily basis. so God brought along John, my friend, my homie, my neighbor (literally) to help bring healing to my heart.

his name means God is merciful and gracious / a gift from God. his name speaks of how my heart feels every time i think of how God orchestrated every little detail for us to be together. he waited 35 years for me to come along, living purely in the eyes of God, completely trusting in God that a wife would come along one day. he had people praying for him. i didn't desire marriage but i had people (literally my whole church & my family, relatives & friends) praying for me that i would one day change my heart.

and my heart was changed.
now i have a fiance.
and i'm getting married.

to say that is one of the greatest miracles of all time. (seriously). if you knew how stubborn i was and how much i hated the idea, you'd know how much of a miracle this was. but God is in the business of transforming lives and changing hearts. and im so glad He changed my heart.

i was reading through emails of prayers of people who cried for my heart to be healed.  i have emails of prophetic words that people have shared to me through out the years of how God spoke to their hearts to pray for my husband. i have emails and letters sent to me by powerful prayer warriors telling me that a marriage was gonna happen soon, even before i moved out to hawaii.

when the righteous pray... God moves heaven and earth for them.

our story is a testimony of how powerful prayers are and how God can truly turn things around in one day. i am so grateful that i get to spend this holiday season with my son and my dog and my fiance, doing what i love to do which is to be a minister and a missionary for God, while living in one of the most beautiful places in the world.  though my journey has been one of pain, tears and a lot of trials, my #oneword2011 journey to BELIEVE has proven that ALL THINGS are possible indeed for him or her who believes. [mk 9:23]