Saturday, September 3, 2011

what do you want?

I said i long for my eyes to be opened to see.
See the beauty in the ashes of my bound up heart.
See the beauty of Your desire for me.
To trust fully and to be free.

You said "hold out your heart" so that I may begin to heal.
I looked at my heart, all bent up and deformed.
The heart that has been crippled by fear.
Bound by rejection. Toughened by circumstances.
Why would You want a heart like this, My God?

You've asked me to open the door that i've tried so hard to close.
You've asked me to tear down the walls i've built for myself.
You've asked me to trust this bleeding heart in Your Hands.
You've asked me to burst the bubble of self-protection that i have built.

Though i try to resist, Your love pulls me in.
Though i try to run away, Your voice lures my heart.
Like a magnet, I keep on coming back.
Deeper and deeper, as i rest in Your embrace.
In Your arms, I know my heart is safe.
In the shadow of your wings, I have found solace.

Every gentle Word You speak chips away at the walls i've tried so hard to build.
Every stroke of Your hand eases the muscles of my constricting heart.
Your smile alone has enough power for me to let go of the grasp.
the grasp on the door i've held on to for so long.

Take my whole heart God, it's completely Yours.
I am choosing to trust You, despite the unseen.
I am choosing to do it scared, even if im completely terrified.
I am choosing to believe, even when everything in me wants to doubt.
I am choosing to live free.
because i know it is for freedom that You came, so that i may be set free.