Thursday, May 19, 2011

in my weakness.

*crickets crickets* it's been quiet here. aside from pictures posted, words have been absent on here... (by the way i havent even had the chance to post all the rest of my 365 for 2011 pics yet so i will have to play catch up when things slow down a bit)...

my life right now is all sorts of hectic. aside from working and homeschooling, i have been quite busy these past few weeks meeting with people after work, trying to raise support for the ministry in Hawaii. im in my 3rd week already and so far so good =]

but, can i just be honest here and tell you... i seriously feel like like someone is beating the living ish out of me. I AM TIRED. not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. dont get me wrong, i have joy in what i am doing because i know this is what God has called me to do for this season and i am so thankful for everyone who has partnered with me and the vision God has put in my heart thus far... but having 3 full time jobs (yes, i consider homeschool a full time job) isn't easy for anyone to tackle especially for a single mother. (anyone wanna trade positions with me for a day?? ;) ha!)

to top it off, i received the news yesterday that my boss is cutting not just my hours but my days at work. i will only be working 3x a week... which means i will only be making less than $200.00 a week. i soooo wasn't expecting that. i thought i would be able to buy a little more time to save at least. i tried looking at it in a positive way by pumping myself up to say that i have more time to do ministry support meetings now....

but today worry and tiredness is getting the best of me. my brain is frazzled. i have no clue how to pay bills next week. so now im here...sitting at starbucks, comforting my heart with some good drip coffee and a cinnamon cake while blabbering out my heart on my blog, as a form of therapy and release, so that i wont go insane. i wish there was something better to say... but right now my heart and my head is void of words...


i am tired... yet i know that I am at the exact place where God wants me... coz He promises that His power is made perfect in my weakness.... and right now im feeling pretty weak and tired and overwhelmed... which means He is about to do something powerful real soon (im hoping and believing that He will anyway)

if you can, please pray for abundant grace for me and my son during this season. we seriously need it. thanks.