Thursday, September 30, 2010

9.30.10 #2.

My son is #2 on the OC list for @SCTNow 2.5K Fundraiser walk to help stop child trafficking. He has 2 more days to raise money. Help him raise $500 to get to #1 and donate to a great cause! Check out for more information on how to give. Thanks so much!


he was the top fundraiser in SoCal for SCTNow Walk!!!

stop child trafficking.

Dear family and friends,

By participating in this walk... I will be doing my part to help save my generation by stopping the bad guys so that they won't be able to do bad things to kids who are just like me.

Help me make a difference in my generation!
Please pray about supporting me in my walk by donating to this cause.(whether it's $1, $5, $10, $20, 50, $100 or more). 100% of the donations will go to Stop Child Trafficking Now Organization.

Child Trafficking Facts
  • There are more than 30 million slaves in the world today.
  • The average age of a trafficked child is 12.
  • 600,000 – 800,000 people are bought and sold across international borders each year; 50% are children, most are female. The majority of these victims are forced into the commercial sex trade. – U.S. Department of State, 2004, Trafficking in Persons Report, Washington, D.C.
  • Over 2 million children are currently enslaved around the world, including every one of the 50 United States.
In an effort to play my part in ending this injustice, I have joined the Stop Child Trafficking Now (SCTNow) Campaign. SCTNow has chosen to fund a bold, new approach, one that addresses the demand side of child sex trafficking by targeting buyers/predators for prosecution and conviction.

On the weekend of October 2-3, 2010, thousands of individuals in communities across the United States and Canada will participate in SCTNow Walks to raise funds and bring awareness to the issue of child trafficking.

Would you join me as I commit to raise funds to end child slavery? You can visit: to donate or give me cash and I will personally give it to SCTNow or write a check to SCTNow you can make a contribution that will make a difference in the life of a child just like me.

If you have any questions about SCTNow please contact my mom or visit

Christian Roa
Team: Passion 4 Freedom
Fundraising Page for SCTNow - Orange County Walk
October 2, 2010 at Heisler Park, Laguna Beach

Thank you so much for your support!


UPDATE: i've reached my goal and have raised above it. $460.00 so far! [thanks Joanie Rapier, Richard Ong, Asia Rush, Sirisha Gummadi, James Biskey, Roy EscosarMyung Carol Kim for giving and thanks to those who are helping me and my mom spread the word!)

my mom is walking too! if you wanna support here: click here

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

9.29.10 rainbow.

Genesis 9:12-18 12 Then God said, “I am giving you a sign of my covenant with you and with all living creatures, for all generations to come. 13 I have placed my rainbow in the clouds. It is the sign of my covenant with you and with all the earth. 14 When I send clouds over the earth, the rainbow will appear in the clouds, 15 and I will remember my covenant with you and with all living creatures. Never again will the floodwaters destroy all life. 16 When I see the rainbow in the clouds, I will remember the eternal covenant between God and every living creature on earth.” 17 Then God said to Noah, “Yes, this rainbow is the sign of the covenant I am confirming with all the creatures on earth.”

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

9.28.10 very special.

This was given to me by a dear friend of mine almost 8 years ago. I'm not a very sentimental person when it comes to 'things' but I've kept this gift and brought it with me everywhere I moved. I love what is written on it and I read it every time I feel discouraged or down (today would be one of those days). Here's what it says:

Your presence is a gift to the world
You're unique and one of a kind.
Your life can be what you want it to be.
Take it one day at a time.

Count your blessings and not your troubles, 
and you'll make it through what comes along.

Within you are so many answers, 
understand, have courage & be strong.

Don't put limits on yourself,
Your dreams are waiting to be realized.
Don't leave your important decisions to chance.
Reach for your peak, your goal & your prize.

Nothing wastes more energy than worrying - 
the longer the problem is carried, the heavier it gets.

Don't take things too seriously, 
live a life of serenity, not regrets.

Remember that a little love goes a long way.
Remember that a lot goes forever.

Remember that friendship is a wise investment,
life's treasures are people... Together.

Have health and hope and happiness, 
take the time to wish on a star. 
And don't ever forget even for a day... 
How very special YOU are.

to those of you who need some encouragement as well... this post is for you.

Monday, September 27, 2010

9.27.10 boxes.


Sunday, September 26, 2010

9.26.10 xoxo.

season 2.

Saturday, September 25, 2010

9.25.10 cupcake.

A pinata cupcake full of sweet goodies! :) 
happy birthday party kubie!

Friday, September 24, 2010

9.24.10 kubie.

Birthday gifts for the princess. 
Bought her a strengths explorer book (amongst other things).
 Her top 3 strengths: organizer, confidence and relating. :) 

Thursday, September 23, 2010

9.23.10 shape.

We tackled the last chapter of S.H.A.P.E. Book tonight. We also tackled some donuts, apple crisps, cheese and crackers and cookies. :) I love my smallgroup.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010


top twelve reasons why you are my favoritest youngest baby sister and why i love you so very much:

12. the way your hair curls on top. i know you hate it coz you used to have super straight hair, but i like it coz it gives me more excuses to help you straighten your hair and do "girly" stuff with you.

11. the fact that you hang out with us (me and christian) every summer, almost the whole summer (for the past 3 years)=] it's almost like a ritual already. you can't seem to get enough of us.

10. eating midnight snacks with you coz we get hungry while watching the food network. (this is WHY i keep in on hgtv/discovery)

9. i love that you love twilight, even if you said you hated it before. ha! coz now we found a reason to go out and bond and have a date without christian having to come with us ;)

8. the fact that you love to read. (yay!) i think out of everyone in the family, i can say you got that from me. =]

7. you are a wonderful writer. i still have all your "short stories" saved on my disk and your story about christmas saved in my christmas box. i know you will be an excellent writer one day. maybe you should start blogging ;) (again just like me...woohoo!)

6. the way you give me the "you need to pray" look =]

5. other girls have no idea how it feels like to grow up in a broken family. to believe for God to heal a skin condition for years and you're still waiting for it to happen. with parents fighting and having to deal with a lot of emotions that we have for the past 3 years. yet you have remained faithful, joyful, strong and understanding through it all.

4. the way you love your nephew. even if you guys fight sometimes and you do things to annoy each other... you always have a blast together and you guys love to annoy me by talking while im sleeping. i also love the way you are so protective of him (especially when the guy was bullying him during his basketball game).

3. how you love to laugh. even if there is no reason to laugh, you will make yourself laugh. and you love to hug. (but i hate it when you hug me while im sleeping).

2. i love our secret conversations and "knowing" looks. especially when we talk about things that only me and you know =]

1. number one reason why i love you is coz you love God, your family and friends so much. you have a tender heart towards everyone that comes along your path and you can't help but believe the best in everyone. your heart to love and care and forgive people has inspired me to want to be more like you.

thank you for arriving 12 years and 9 months ago.
you've made my world a much better place.
happy happy happy 12th birthday kubs.
i love you always.

9.22.10 gluttony.

eat all you can korean bbq = gluttony galore.

happy birthday kubie.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

9.21.2010 oy vey.

borrowed dvd's on sunday night. it's only tuesday night and I'm on disc 4. Oy vey! mega insomnia! all for the love of chuck bass :)

Monday, September 20, 2010

9.20.10 pie party.

We had a PIE (Pastor's Information Exchange) Party at my friend's place. We had food, more food, fruits and pie. While we ate, the pastors informed us on how to be more involved with the new building campaign we have. It was the perfect excuse to stuff myself with marie callender's banana cream pie & german chocolate pie. It's sanctified food since it was a church event, so I'm sure it wont go to my hips ;) LOL

Sunday, September 19, 2010

9.19.10 sticks and stones...

Sticks and stones and deadman's bones. Great message about God using the simplest of people with the simplest of things in their hands, paired up with tenacious faith and passion.

Saturday, September 18, 2010

9.18.10 cannonball.

Visiting Jerry and Angela up in Visalia. :)

Friday, September 17, 2010

9.17.10 movie night.

date night with my son. cozy underneath a blankie. drinking sweet tea for me & oreos & milk for my son while watching avatar. :)

Thursday, September 16, 2010


a couple of years ago, my dear friend and smallgroup leader challenged us (the women in her smallgroup) to start believing and dreaming big dreams for our lives. we went through lesson after lesson on how to write your mission and vision statement to writing out your personal dreams as well as the God-given ones and making goals on how to attain them. and one of the challenges she gave us was to be vulnerable enough to make a dream book / board.

during that time, it was hard for me to make my  dream book, because i was going through a very rough time. i didn't have a place of my own (me & my son were sleeping on sleeping bags on the floor), i had no job. no car. no open doors for ministry. i was deep in debt coz i didn't have stable work and my parents were on the brink of getting a divorce so our family was extremely hurt. i couldn't even bear to think to dream. BUT, because im a team player - i went along with the group and started doing my dream book anyway.

as cheesy as it sounded at first, the group really got excited about it, especially towards the end. we had a night where we all shared our dream boards / books to each other. we had no idea how monumental that night was going to be and how it would mark us for the rest of our lives.

fast forward 2 years after... the people in that group are now living out some of the dreams that they have shared. my mentor, who was single & living in a cramped apartment back then, is now married and living in a 3 bedroom house with a beautiful garden. my friend, who was working for a facility is now running her own facility for the elderly. another friend who had been praying for mexico for 10 years, went to mexico to help with a church plant and is now back here from that mission trip. and well... 

as for me...i have a BED, a room for me and my son, a wonderful dog, a nice, new car and a stable job, healing for my family, more open doors for ministry, AND.....

i am now sharing the exact same lessons to my own smallgroup and encouraging the women in my group to dream as well. through doing my dreambook, i realized that one of the things i love to do is to inspire people to DREAM BIG DREAMS. (that's my theme for this year)

my smallgroup is now getting ready to do their own dream board / book. i did a book last time, but now i am doing a dream board so i can use it for short term goals that i would like to achieve.

i can tell some women in the group are excited about this project, but there are some who have that same "look" in their eyes the way i had 2 years ago. the look that says "how can i dream right now if my life is in shambles?" 

to those women i say "DREAM even more". that's what gets me excited. the fact that i was in that same boat and yet, God delivered me out of that season and has given and is giving me more than what i thought  i would get. that gets me so pumped to dream and believe for bigger things for others. in 2 years time, He was able to turn things around in my life and continues to surprise me by opening doors i thought he never would. i know what He's done for me and my other friends, He will do for others as well.

i serve a BIG GOD... that is why i DREAM BIG.  i encourage you dear reader, dream big dreams for Him. He promises that no eye has seen and no ears have heard what He has in store for those He loves and He is always faithful to fulfill His Promises.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

9.15.10 overtime.

Workin' hard overtime to make that extra $$$ #LifeOfASingleMom

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

9.14.10 Hotwheels.

Christian is putting his hotwheels track together. 
Bambam is helping him too :)

Monday, September 13, 2010

9.13.10 lukewarm.

a plea to my generation.
a generation that does as it pleases from monday - saturday.
and praises God on sunday.

a generation who embraces spirituality,
as long as it doesn't get in the way of the lusts and desires of our flesh.

we are utterly mistaken if we continue to live this way.
because there is no middle ground.

it's either we love Him with all our heart, mind, soul and strength or we don't. 

it's either we make Him Lord of ALL 
(our heart, our mind, our future, our decisions, our past, our thoughts, our dreams & more) 
or we turn our back and renounce Him as King. 

we can't be lukewarm.

coz He said if we're lukewarm, we're like vomit to His mouth.

so keep on fanning the flame of the gift of salvation, faith, hope and love.

let's continue to serve Him with awe and reverential fear.

praying and pushing forward to build His Kingdom 

by loving others and telling others about Him.

because the last thing you (and i) want at the end of our life 

is for Jesus to spew us out and vomit us out of His mouth.

eternal damnation is to not have His presence with us for the rest of eternity.

"I know all the things you do, that you are either hot nor cold. I wish that you were one or the other! But since you are lukewarm, neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth" - Jesus [revelations 3:15-16]

Sunday, September 12, 2010

9.12.10 5771.

Celebrating the 1st weekend of the Jewish New Year. 
L'Shanah Tova! 
(Ascend Malibu Church)

here are some of the things i learned from my visit in this church. this is rabbi jason sobel.  if anyone wants to know more about the roots of our faith as christians, visit this church and learn from this man. i learned so much wisdom and truth in just one hour.

rosh hashanah:
* sara, rachel and hannah all conceived during a rosh hashanah.
* joseph was freed from prison on rosh hashanah

*joseph always kept it real and had integrity. he refused to compromise. true trust in God means you recognize the hand of God in all things. if you can't see the hand of God, then trust in the heart of God.

*refinement - he wants to refine us to prepare us to the place of promotion. purification of self reliance. joseph told the cup bearer to remember him (which was a way of trusting in man not God), which added 2 more years of him staying in prison. 

*when God tested abraham (genesis 22) - the word test is the same word (nassa/nissi) in hebrew which means to lift up / banner. God brings trials into our lives to refine us and raise us up. 

*how grateful we are in the prison will determine how much praise we will give to Him in the palace.

*it's in the valley where you grow, not the mountain top places.

*one of the keys that joseph had to get the breakthrough is that he carried wisdom and revelation to understand the times and know what to do.

*joseph knew that God's dreams and God's promises always come to pass. you can't kill a God dream. remain faithful.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

9.11.10 chips & vinegar.

Eating chips and vinegar 
(eating it cereal style - chips drenched & swimming in vinegar)!
Pairing it up with iced tea! Sooooo gooood! 

Friday, September 10, 2010

9.10.10 jacuzzi.

Hanging out at the jacuzzi. Perfect way to relax after a loooong day of going to LAX to say goodbye to a dear friend, working and homeschooling. Hello weekend! :)

lonely but not alone.

my heart has been feeling lonely as of late. not alone but lonely.

i know this season has a lot to do with what God has been speaking and is continuing to speak to me about REST and letting go. it started with learning to say no to activities (from fellowship to church events and things i actually love doing) so that i could find more alone time to be with Him, my family and my loved ones. and it has been a wonderful time being free from false burdens that i had put on my shoulders regarding having to perform in order for God to open doors for me for breakthrough. (more about that on another post).

it went from that to learning to let go of people who mean a lot to me. there seems to be an exodus of people that i love the most who are leaving LA and moving to another place. in fact most of all of my closest friends who i have invested my time and my heart to for the past 7.5 years have either left or will leave in the near future....which i know is God ordained (for them and for me as well) but it still hurts to think about it. and that thought pretty much leaves my heart feeling heavy.

with the feeling of being lonely, i am learning to rest my heart in Him alone. i found that withdrawing from everything to be with God is something that is vital for me at this specific season of my life. i realized that because im an uber-extrovert... i will hang out with people (or talk to people - whether in real life or online) and it somehow becomes a way of escape. it's almost like God has forced this circumstance of loneliness so i learn to become more of a "hermit" and spend more time with Him and do the things that really matter the most for this season of my life.

i've gotten a few confirmations (in the Word and with other people) regarding this season i'm in so I know that this isn't just me, but it's the Holy Spirit doing a deeper work in me. it's a way for God to go deeper still and heal certain areas of my heart by allowing me to feel lonely.  somehow, i feel like this season is the quiet before the volcano erupts. like He wants to me to learn how to rest, quiet and still my soul, my mind, my heart.. before He brings in more fruits in my life as He now takes me through the process of pruning and weeding.

the bible says: "but Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed" [luke 5:16]. withdrawing is something Jesus often did which means it's something that i must often do too. withdrawing to the lonely places (not just physically) but also in the lonely places of my heart is something that i need. because it's in those quiet, lonely moments where i'm left to face the rawness of my heart. withdrawing to the lonely places drives me to pray. it creates a desperation in me to long for my Master in a way that i don't feel when im "busy". in the lonely place, i don't need a facade, i don't need to prove myself, i don't need to perform. i can just be me.

it is also in the lonely place where i meet the One who encourages me, speaks destiny to me, sings over me, heals, me, fills me up, and gives me the passion and love and the power so that, after spending ample time alone with Him, i will be full enough to bear even more fruit and brave the crowds and give of myself once again.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

9.9.10 shogun.

Me and my son with one of my bestesest friend (and dear sister) tita anna. It's her last night here in LA before she flies back to the "lou" and we're pigging out on BSCR's at shogun sushi. #yum

day by day by day.

random thursday post:

 one of my favoritest movies ever is meet the parents (and meet the fockers). and one of the best scenes  in this movie is when greg was asked to say grace. this video clip always makes me laugh. see video here:

"Oh, dear God, thank you, you are such a good god to us. A kind and gentle and accommodating God, and we thank you oh sweet, sweet lord of hosts for the smorgasbord you have so aptly laid at our table this day, and each day, by day, day by day, by day oh dear Lord three things we pray to love thee more dearly, to see thee more clearly, to follow thee more nearly, day, by day, by day. Amen." - Greg Focker

name one (or more) of your favorite comedy movies?

*picture belongs to:

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

9.8.10 back to school.

All sharp and ready for school.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

9.7.10 good gifts.

we celebrated my papa's 50th birthday today. (i call him papa coz he is my step-dad... and i call my biological father daddy)

my sister had been emailing me, telling me how hard it was to find the exact gift my papa wanted (which was a blue sperry topsider (i know it's oh-so-80's). 

she had searched and searched and searched online for it...and finally found one in his size. perfect. 

it was the exact gift he wanted. he has been wanting to have one for years. his girlfriend said he mentioned it this morning and was thinking of getting it himself. little did he know... it was already wrapped up for him and would be given to him that very night. 

the look on my papa's face when he opened the gift was priceless. he turned 50, but his smile radiated and showed the youthfulness of his heart, just like a child opening a gift on christmas morning.

i learned a few things as i watched him open his gift. i thought to myself: imagine if he wasn't specific with his requests and didn't say what he wanted, then how could we have known what to get him? also, imagine if he was in such a hurry to buy it and he didn't even bother waiting for it but went out to get it himself. the element of surprise would have been ruined.

it reminded me of the saying: good things come to those who wait.

but i will add to that and say: good things come to those
 who ask specifically and wait on God.

i have to constantly remind myself to keep on being specific when it comes to conversations with my Father and to keep on waiting on Him with a youthful, excited heart. sometimes desiring and wanting things (even godly things) rouse something in us and somehow we want to "make it happen" for us. instead of wanting to wait... we will try to go out and "buy". 

though we have exactly what we want when we "buy" it, it's a very different experience when something is given to you as a gift and it was given out of the blue and it came as a surprise to you. because when we open the gift that we've been praying will be more than what we've asked for and our hearts will truly be overjoyed and the gift will be more treasured.

i am reminded that there is beauty and strength in waiting for God's perfect timing in regards to answered prayers and dreams and gifts. because He has the best in mind for us and He is waiting for the perfect time to give them to us. as a loving Father, He can't wait to watch us smile like a child once the gift is unwrapped and unraveled right before our eyes. 

my lesson for the day: ask specifically. wait on Him and rest in His love. the gifts will come in due time.

If you, then, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him [matthew 7:11]

Monday, September 6, 2010


Sand. Sun. Starbucks. Solace. :) 
What more can I ask for. 
(Location: Marina Del Ray)

Sunday, September 5, 2010

8.5.10 five-oh.

at sycamore grove
celebrating my papa's50th birthday.
can't believe he's already 50.
happy birthday papa.
thank you for all wisdom,
patience and the love you've given.
we love you.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

9.4.10 smorgasbord.

Today was a fun-filled day filled with food. family. friendship. fun. and more food. 

This morning we had our monthly breakfast and prayer meeting and the host prepared tapa, hot dog, bangus and danggit (care of the escosars). #YUM!

Then we went to portos (tita anna's request) to grub on some cheese rolls, potato balls & napoleon cake. #YumAgain

After swimming, we headed to starbucks to beat the heat. #YumYumSomeMore

Then for dinner, my son wanted for me and him to have a date night so he bought me Zangkou Chicken! It was delish! And we had a great time talking, praying together and watching non-sense on tv. #EvenMoreYumYum

Saving the best for last, God gave me some food for my soul. Psalm 113:6-9.
I'm so full of food, of hope and of love! #ImSoVeryBlessed

Friday, September 3, 2010

9.3.10 bowl.

Earth, wind and fire @ the bowl. 
Enjoying the fireworks while dancing to 
september and groove tonight! :)

Thursday, September 2, 2010

9.2.10 blacktealemonade.

Simple things that make my heart smile in the summer - black tea lemonade at starbucks.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

9.1.10 right side up.

When me and my best friend/sisters are together, 
my world is turned upside down in the best way possible! 
our once a year reunion with A! :)


i came across old pictures of me and my relatives and friends and i decided to post some of them on facebook.

one of the pictures that i posted was this:

if you can't tell...the one of the left is me.

the one with the cigarette.
the one with short hair.
i was probably 16 or 17. 
and at the height of my rebellion.
outside i was laughing.
but inside i was broken.
i had no idea if i wanted to be a man or a woman - so i was both.
i was utterly confused.
i was always drunk or high.
i had rage like incredible hulk.
my heart was so hard.
 it was incapable to love.
i didn't really care deeply about anything or anyone, even me.
i was extremely lost.

as i looked at the pic... i just marveled at how faithful God is to His promise that HE makes all things new. it has been about 13-14 years since this pic was taken... and though i wish i still had the same "weight" i had back then... i know that whoever that was on the pic is not me anymore. i know that my countenance is different. the way i think is different. the way i act is very different. though my personality is still quirky and zany and i still talk with my hands flailing in front of my face and  laugh out loud like it's nobody's business... i know that God has changed something to the very core of me that assures me that whoever that "pat" was... is not anymore.

no longer in rebellion.
i have found joy.
my identity is secure.
my heart is made whole.
and my destiny is sure.
my source of "high" is laughter and His Spirit.
i am no longer a slave to sin.
i live in peace instead of rage.
now i long to love and serve and give.
 i am no longer lost, but found.
and i belong to Him.

what a HUGE difference God can make
in a person who's life is fully surrendered to Him.

has there been a big difference in your life since you came to know Jesus?

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! [2Cor.5:17]